Open Letter to My Fox-Viewing Friends

I’ve got a couple of friends who watch a lot of Fox News. One person in particular, a good friend who lives across the street from me. When I go into his house more often than not he’s got good old Fair and Balanced oozing from his vegbox. Remarkably, this is a person of considerable intelligence and whose judgement and opinions I otherwise generally respect. This one goes out to youse all:

My Dear Friends,

Why do you watch that shit? Haven’t I told you time and again it’s full of lies, distortions and propaganda? Well here’s some more evidence for that proposition, quoted from AlterNet.org.
You can read the study itself here.

Based on several nationwide surveys it conducted with California-based Knowledge Networks since June, as well as the results of other polls, [University of Maryland’s Program on International Policy Attitudes (PIPA)] found that 48 percent of the public believe US troops found evidence of close pre-war links between Iraq and the al-Qaeda terrorist group; 22 percent thought troops found weapons of mass destruction (WMD) in Iraq; and 25 percent believed that world public opinion favored Washington’s going to war with Iraq. All three are misperceptions[…]

[N]ews sources also accounted for major differences in misperceptions, according to PIPA, which asked more than 3,300 respondents since May where they “tended to get most of [their] news.” Eighty percent identified broadcast media, while 19 percent cited print media.

Among those who said broadcast media, 30 percent said two or more networks; 18 percent, Fox News; 16 percent, CNN; 24 percent, the three big networks — NBC (14 percent), ABC (11 percent), CBS (9 percent); and three percent, the two public networks, National Public Radio (NPR) and Public Broadcasting Service (PBS).

For each of the three misperceptions, the study found enormous differences between the viewers of Fox, who held the most misperceptions, and NPR/PBS, who held the fewest by far. Eighty percent of Fox viewers were found to hold at least one misperception, compared to 23 percent of NPR/PBS consumers. All the other media fell in between.

Yeah I added the yellow highlighting and the italics. Fox viewers, don’t worry, you can wipe it off your monitor with a soft, clean, damp cloth.

How do I pray like bush?

There was a picture, black and white, in some publication recently that showed the dear leader with his cabinet before the festivities had begun and they were all praying. I was entranced by the image – they were perfectly composed – all in a row. Their heads were bowed at the same angle; hands held in a posture signifying their humbleness; eyes squinched tightly closed. They all wore the same uniform but because it was in B&W I couldn’t make out the color of the ties. I’m sure they were the same. Look – I can’t join in praying like the leader of the free world if my tie isn’t the correct color; don’t you agree? Sometimes it is red, sometimes blue. If anyone can help me with my problem or has a thought/guess about the correct color I would be more than grateful for the help. Oh! I almost forgot – what the fuck are they praying for?

If the shoe fits, then for fuck’s sake, wear it!

I realize it’s now passé, but really. Those MoveOn folks are starting to disappoint with their wussiness. The winning ad, chosen by the MoveOn voters, that CBS is nixing is too tame for my taste. The Hitler ones are actually good — not to mention powerful.
Hitler had to defend Germany against Polish aggression, right?
Thanks to theMemoryHole.org for posting the ads that MoveOn pulled.